If you’re old enough to be desiring menopause information and helpful strategies for it, you’re probably also old enough to call to mind the TV advertisement adage “You’re not getting older, you’re getting better.” If you’re similar to me, when you first heard it you probably imagined your mother or even your grandmother, and you probably doubted if that statement could be factual. By now, I hope you know that it is. Actually, if there was ever a generation that would work out how to beat the aging game, it would most certainly be this one. And in many ways, we have achieved just that– through diet, exercise, proper nutrients and with access to better medical care– not to mention Botox.

But while this is clearly not “your mother’s menopause,” it’s also not necessary to push yourself to the limit by trying to prove that point– particularly in regards to your appearance. While I firmly believe that keeping an eye on your weight at midlife and keeping your body active is not only important but vital to your future health, too often, I feel that women– you, me, all of us– put a bit much emphasis on our body image, especially as we get older, and definitely during the menopause years.

It seems the older we get the more concerned we become with our looks. Similar to how our mothers and grandmothers caved to the “elderly” image at fifty, it seems we are pressing ourselves hard in the opposite direction, forcing ourselves to emulate and compare ourselves to images that are quite simply unattainable. It seems, as soon as we hit the wrong side of forty, we fall under some type of all-consuming youth-fixation that totally undermines the fact that we are exceptional wives, outstanding mothers, wonderful friends, self-made career gals– and instead leaves us looking for the meaning of life in the dressing room at Nordstroms or at the Cosmetic surgeon’s office. We wake up one morning and the only measure of our worth/value we see is the number on the weight scale– and the higher it is, the lesser we feel.

There is absolutely nothing wrong in taking great pride in your appearance, and if you have a few lines and creases to show for your age, don’t feel you need to push yourself to an extreme just to meet somebody else’s ideal of what you should look like or who you should be. Don’t fear, or be ashamed or embarrassed to embrace the changes that pertain to this half of your life as well– and don’t fight who you are, or all you have become.

Ultimately, for every line on your face, for each inch around your belly, for every extra pound you carry, there is a repository of wisdom, experience, self-assurance, victory and courage– so don’t forget that. Rejoice in yourself– and your life. You’ve earned it!